Lately I have been getting a lot of offers from people in a lot of foreign countries to move money for them. Usually it is millions and millions of money. Now why would a stranger want to give me millions and millions of money and trust me to keep it safe for them? Do you think this could be a dishonest scam or something? Nah! These are just good people trying to get their estates settled when they find millions and millions of dollars in Uncle Jacks ol Sea Chest that he left in the Attic after he died. Good ol Uncle Jack squirreled away millions and millions of dollars and they just need a perfect stranger to help them find a safe money port for them. Sometimes it is worse. Some war or rebellion in another country ousted them out and these poor souls have to get millions and millions of dollars out of the country and need, you guessed it, a safe STRANGER to stash it for them.
I have tried to help. I tell them to send me cash to an unknown address. I give them my old address at the vacant lot so I can pick up the money. I tell them I will meet them in the back of a church in disquise, usually wearing an Ozzy Osborne or baseball shirt or Big Bird costume so not to be noticed. I ask them to send cash so I can trust them not to write me a bad check. Still. No one has returned my email and asked me for their help again.
I wonder why? Yes, why did they ask me in the first place if they are not willing to follow up with their plan to get these million and millions of dollars safely put away? Do my fonts in my emails look dishonest? I am baffled. So, to anyone out there that has millions and millions of money dollars that need a safe stranger to handle. Please I trust you. I now am willing to accept checks and credit cards.